Exploring

There comes a time in every woman’s life when she needs to throw caution to the wind and explore. Every woman has something inside them that needs to be released. Some have fear, some have a forbidden love or desire, and for others, like myself it can be all of those things and more. The time had come for me to let my hair down and let that hidden part of myself out for the world to see. I remember it, all of it. The feelings, the thoughts, the sights and smells, and I remember him.

I am not sure how Karl became a part of my life, it is like he has always been there. He started out as a harmless flirtation. But soon became an invaluable friend. He listened to me when I needed a confidant. He made me laugh when I was down. Karl also had a way about him that made me weak. When I was talking to him on the phone, he would make a sound like half moaning, half sighing. His voice was soft, but yet masculine, firm. When I saw him for the first time, I immediately noticed the sparkle in his blue eyes. The warmth to his smile, they way his reddish brown hair seemed to defy him by not quite lying just so. Yes, he was handsome, but the fire and passion that I knew burned inside him, is what I wanted. We had talked about so many things. Each conversation started out on its own merits, but ended at the same place. I wanted to be controlled, and Karl wanted to control. He wanted to control me.

He had come into town for a convention. Weeks earlier we had begun to talk about meeting, and possibly exploring our desires. I was so nervous, not quite sure of what I was doing. The strong need I felt inside urged me forward with our plan. As I dressed that late afternoon I chose a dark blue dress, conservative, but romantic. I wore my hair loose, swirling around my shoulders, soft and free. My shoes were a medium heel and the same shade of blue as my dress. They were adorned with a small bow accent. I had decided to drive myself, so if things didn’t work out I could leave. I wanted this to happen. I needed it to happen. My entire life I had always been the one in control. I was always in charge and I needed that to change, even if only for one night.

Karl had chosen to stay at a hotel in the heart of downtown. As I broke free from the traffic plaguing the busy streets, I pulled into the parking garage, took a ticket and found an empty spot. Straightening the skirt of my dress, I stepped from the car and closed the door. The sounds of my footsteps echoed throughout the parking garage, adding to my feelings of nervousness. The elevator doors opened right away, and soon I was inside the hotel, and only minutes from meeting him.

We had agreed to meet by the hotel pool. The bar had seemed much too crass and public, and we both felt comfortable enough with each other to warrant a private place. As the elevator doors opened to the lobby I could see past the desk, to the pool. There he was sitting, waiting for me. He neither faced me, nor had his back to me. I found myself looking at the incredible profile of the man I wanted. He must have sensed me there, for he turned and looked right at me. His smile blossomed right before my eyes, and the warmth I found coming from him was intensely calming.

"Dana?"

"Hi Karl." I said averting my eyes, feeling my cheeks redden. When I finally looked up at him I saw his smile again. He bent over and placed a gentle kiss on my cheek.. Our eyes met, and something happened. A primitive current ran between us, and seemed to ignite our passions. Karl once again bent close to me. This time I met his kiss with one of my own. Our bodies pressed together as our lips crushed each others. We broke apart, breathless, and wanting, no, needing more.

"Would you like to get a drink? Or are you hungry? We could get something to eat." He offered.

"No, I am fine, thanks."

"Well?"

"Well." We both laughed nervously. "Do you have a nice room?" I asked.

"Yes I do. Would you like to see it?" The twinkle was back in his eyes, and a huge boyish grin covered his face.

"Alright." Was all I could get past the lump in my throat. He took my hand and we walked back to the elevator. The doors closed and he pushed the button for the ninth floor. We walked off the elevator side by side and as he slipped the card into the lock, I started to wonder what I was doing there. Here I was standing next to this man that I had only spoken with on the phone. But, he knew so much about me. He knew my secrets, my hidden desires. He knew what I wanted and needed. I knew that I could not turn back and run. I had to finish what I had started. I had to do this, for myself.

The room was a standard hotel room at first glance, nothing out of the ordinary. As I moved further into the room I noticed a few strips of silk cloth peeking out from under a pillow. My heart began to flutter with anticipation. I turned to look for Karl. He had let me enter the room before him, and he hadn’t said anything to me since the elevator. When I turned I found him sitting in the chair, watching me. He looked a little different. His eyes were not as soft and tender, there was something dark in them now. "Dana, take off your dress for me."

"What?"

"Do it. Do it now."

"Karl, I..." The sound of his voice cut me off.

"Dana? Isn’t this what you told me you wanted? Didn’t you say you wanted me to control you? Didn’t you say you wanted me to have you do what I wanted?"

"Yes" It was barely more than a whisper.

"Dana, take off your dress for me. First one button, then the other."

I did as I was told. My shaking fingers found their way to the front of my dress and slowly began to unbutton the navy cloth covered buttons. When I had finished with the last button, the dress slid from my shoulders and fell into a pool at my feet. I stopped, not sure what to do next, when Karl voiced his desire.

"Step from your dress, and slowly take your bra off." I felt a heat rise to my face. His eyes, the way he was watching me was so intense, and yet so very exciting. Stepping out of the pool of fabric that puddle around my ankles, my hand reached for one of the shoulder straps of my green bra, and I pulled it down, very slowly. My breasts sprang free, my nipples instantly hardening. I reached for the waist band of my matching green panties, and I once again, I heard Karl’s voice command. "Stop!" I started to ask him what he wanted me to do next. When my eyes met his, the words stuck in my throat. "Good girl." He said, looking into the depths of my eyes. Pull and pinch your nipples. I want to see how hard they can get."

Karl was reaching that place in my soul. That place that made me crave this attention. He was tormenting me, making me feel sexy, wanted, and shy all at the same time. Never before had I felt so turned on, so ready. Every cell in my body was aware of what was happening. It went beyond the physical. My mind was alert and ready for this man. I wanted to torture him as much as he was me. I touched my hips, and began sliding my hands over the softly rounded curves, up to my stomach, finally cupping my breasts, lifting. My hands lightly squeezed the firm flesh, making the darkened buds tighten even more. When my fingers grazed over the peaks, they pinched and pulled. My eyes never left Karl’s. I was beginning to feel bold, and confident.

"Stop!" He ordered. My hands fell down to my sides. He rose from his chair and walked towards me, stopping only inches from my body. His fingers found my nipples. He tugged at each breast, almost too hard, but never quite turning the pleasant sensation to pain. Then he stopped. "Undress me." I reached for the buttons of his shirt and deftly released them. I pulled the neat shirt tails from his pants and reached for the cuffs at his wrists. When they too were opened, my hands spread the shirt across his matted chest, and down his arms. My palms came into contact with his nipples, and the surprised gasp I heard told me that I was doing exactly what I had intended to do. I played the innocent, pretending the touch had been an accident. His belt and pants took no more than seconds to undo. Once again, Karl sat down in his chair, as I untied his shoes, and stripped him of the rest of his clothing, leaving only his boxers. I stood back, not sure if he wanted me to continue or stop. "Finish what you started Dana." He told me.

Karl stood quickly, his hands were on my shoulders, pushing me down to my knees. I knelt before him and removed his boxers. His hardness, once freed, was right before me. His scent was intoxicating. I wanted desperately to taste him, to see what he felt like, but I was ordered to stand. "Dana, go into the bathroom and start to fill the tub." As I walked in, I was surprised to see the oversized bathtub. It was round, and deep, large enough for two people to sit inside very comfortably.

"Would you like the water hot, or warm?" I asked.

"Make it hot." Karl answered, simply. I turned on the faucet, testing the water till it was perfect, hot but not too hot. I found a bottle of bubble bath sitting on the floor next to the filling tub, and poured a large amount into the water. Colorful bubbles soon magically appeared, spreading across the steaming surface. When the bath was filled, I reached across the suds and turned off the tap. Turning around, I gasped, and jumped, startled. I didn’t realize Karl was standing behind me, watching.

"That is good. Now step out of the way so I can get in." I moved to the side, waiting till he was immersed, then I started to get in beside him. "No!" He said crisply. "I didn’t say this bath was for you. I want you to bathe me, not take a bath with me." I felt humiliated, and was tempted to leave, to go home, but then I remembered that this is what I had wanted. I wanted to be controlled. I wanted to be told what to do and when to do it. I wanted to please this man. "There is a large natural sponge inside my suitcase. Go get it." Silently I padded out of the bathroom, still nude except for the pale green panties.

I found the suitcase. Opening it, I took the sponge in my hand and walked back into the bathroom. "That was very good Dana, now bathe me, completely." Heat stung my hands as I dipped them into the water, filling the sponge. I ran it across Karl’s back, his shoulders, and arms. The water formed rivers as it found it’s way back to the pool of bubbles. His muscles rippled underneath my searching, caressing hands. He felt strong, smooth, and very masculine. The water splashed as the sponge slipped from my grasp. Taking the bar of soap I ran it over his chest, my fingers tangling in the soft wet curls. Karl reached out and grabbed my wrist. "I told you to wash all of me." Guiding my hand lower and lower, he closed my fingers around his hard shaft. I stroked as I washed, marveling in the strength of his erection. Loving the hardness, and the smooth softness of his skin. "That’s enough." He stood up abruptly, and reached for a towel. "Now it is your turn. Hurry and wash yourself." I began to step into the cooled water. "Dana, you are forgetting something, your panties are still on." Before I knew what was happening he reached out and tore them from my hips. "Now you may wash."

The water had cooled considerably, but still felt heavenly. I lowered myself into the depths of the bubbles, and reached for the sponge. Karl stood there, drying himself, and watching my every move. I scrubbed my shoulders, neck, and arms till they were pink. Then I slowly brushed the sponge over my breasts and across my nipples, down my stomach, and lower, to the apex of my womanhood. Lifting my eyes to Karl, I noticed that he was stroking his cock as he watched me. Once again my face reddened. "Touch yourself Jennifer. I want to watch you wash yourself there." My fingers found their way to my center, and penetrated. My eyes closed and a moan escaped my lips. Instantly Karl reached down and picked me from the pool of water and soap. He carried me out into the room. Laying me down on the bed, he reached for a towel and covered my nakedness. His hand slipped under the pillow and brought out several precut strips of silk. Grabbing my wrists, one at a time he firmly tied me to the headboard, my arms raised above my head. As quickly as he secured my wrists, he took my ankles and bound them to the base of the bed. I laid there, open, and defenseless. There was one strip of silk remaining. It was placed over my eyes, and knotted behind my head. I could not move. I could not see. My remaining senses became alive as I tried to figure out what Karl planned to do with me.

"Karl, please......" I begged.

"Shush." He said. "You don’t need to be talking." I felt his hands moving the towel that covered my body. He seemed to be drying me. The towel circled my breasts, moving them from side to side, gently rubbing over my nipples. Lower he went, drying my stomach, my hips, he brushed over my mound, teasing, but not stopping. He dried the insides of my thighs, and I felt his breath, hot and moist. Once again I moaned and struggled against the ties that held me. I raised my hips in the direction I thought the heat had come from, but found nothing. Slowly the towel began moving again. It traveled down my legs, over my knees and calves, then it was gone. There was nothing. No sounds, no feelings, no smells, nothing.

"Karl?" I called. I was answered with the sound of a door opening and closing. I knew then that I was alone. The silence was deafening. Time passed slowly. The telephone rang, but no one answered it. I heard voices come and go as people passed by the door of his hotel room. Never had I felt so isolated, so vulnerable. The longer I laid there, the more insecure and frightened I became. I just wanted him to come back. I just wanted him to come back so I wouldn’t be so, so alone. Tears of frustration were started to well up into my eyes. Regret that I had let myself be put in this situation seeped into my mind. I started to will the door to open, but it remained shut.

I awoke to the sounds of the door opening. Finally I thought to myself. I was going to demand that Karl release me. I had had enough. I wanted to go home. Before I could express my wishes, I heard another sound, this one was of metal clanking. It sounded like something heavy was being brought into the room. I called out, "Karl?" There was no response. "Karl, please. I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to go home." Still no response. The rattling had stopped and I could feel Karl checking the ties that bound me. Thinking he was loosening them, I started to thank him, but stopped. He was not loosening. He was tightening. "No......." I cried out. Still there was no response. Then I felt something soft trailing over my arms. It sent shivers running through me. The softness went from my arms, to my neck and face, then down over my breasts, where it seemed to linger at my nipples. Against my wishes, my body started to betray me, and respond. I could feel the wetness once again forming deep inside my center. Around and around the softness went, circling my breasts, teasing my nipples. Then gradually it started its path down my stomach, and across the lips of my heated pussy. I could feel the blood curse through my veins. Suddenly I didn’t want to leave anymore. I loved what was happening to me. I loved the mystery of not being able to move, of not being able to see what was happening. I loved not knowing what was going to happen next.

I felt hands on my thighs, moving slowly upward, opening me. I felt that hot, moist breath swirling around my womanhood again. Then bolts of electricity charged through my body as I felt his tongue dance over my clit, and bury itself inside my deep folds. He tormented me. Licking, sucking, tonguing, taking me to the brink of my release and then stopping. He pushed his fingers deep inside me and then slid them into my mouth, letting me taste my own sweetness. He brushed his fingers over my nipples, making them harden and almost beg for more of his touch. Over and over again he took me to the heights of passion, only to let me spiral down, unfulfilled.

Finally, I felt the sweetness of his tongue stroking at my slit. Slowly he penetrated me with it. Nipping at my bud, sucking at the entrance to my body. I writhed in pleasure and unspent passion. Begging to have my release. Hands glided up the sides of my body and encased my breasts as the sweet assault continued. The moment Karl began to tug at my nipples I exploded into a prism of color. I bucked against his mouth, and screamed out his name. Immediately I felt him move away. My mind was whirling...was he leaving again? My unasked question was quickly and silently answered by the thrusting of his hard cock into my still trembling pussy. Over and over he thrust, each one harder and deeper than the one before. His hands seemed to be everywhere....On my breasts, my clit, in my mouth. Karl was fucking me harder and faster than I had ever been fucked before.

The bed bang out the rhythm against the wall. I knew almost everyone around us must have heard, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was this feeling, this glorious, sexy feeling. This man was incredible. He slipped his hands under my shoulders and lifted me off the bed as much as the restraints would let him. His mouth searched out and found my neck, my shoulders, and finally my breasts. His lips suckled at my nipples. His teeth raked over them. His love-making was intense, hard, passionate, almost violent at times. He suddenly dropped my shoulders, and I feel hard onto the bed. He reached for and grabbed at my hips and ass, squeezing, digging his nails into my flesh. Once again he lifted me and drove me down onto him with each thrust he made. With an agonizing cry that seemed to come from the depths of his soul, Karl poured his seed inside me. Collapsing on top of me, he laid there, his head cradled on my breasts until his breathing returned too normal.

"Karl?" I asked. "Will you please untie me? I want to hold you." Without a word he rose, and I heard and felt him move away from me. I waiting to feel the relief of my wrists and ankles being freed, but instead, I heard a sharp noise of the metal clanging again and the door opening, and closing. Just as I was about to dissolve into tears, thinking that I was being left alone, my bonds were cut. I immediately removed the blindfold and saw Karl standing there before me, naked, splendid. He was smiling down at me with the same boyish grin he had at the pool. All trace of darkness was gone from his eyes. He looked happy, sweet, and sated. Bending over he placed a very gentle kiss on my lips, and handed me a rose. It was then that I noticed that he was fully dressed. "Karl? I don’t understand." I said, puzzled. He looked down into my eyes, touched my cheek and said, "Till we meet again. And we will meet again." With that he moved away, and walked out the door, closing it softly behind him.

I dressed quickly, not sure what had just happened to me. So many emotions and thoughts were flooding my mind. I was unable to sort through them and realize what I was feeling. Taking one last look around the room, the door opened again. This time I was the one slipping through it. I made my way back to the elevator, to the parking garage, and into my car. I was still in a fog and carelessly spilled my purse onto the seat beside me. There amid the cosmetics, hairbrush, personal items, and checkbook, was a video tape. I picked it up and looked at it. The only clue I had as to what it was, were the handwritten words, ENJOY......, LOVE, KARL. Putting my car in reverse, I sped out of the garage, and hurried home. Once I got there, I rushed to the TV inserted the videotape and pushed play. What I saw amazed and dumbfounded me. There I was, tied to the bed. Karl was there too, sitting next to me, in a chair, watching a woman. A beautiful red-haired woman was the one that had kissed, licked, and suckled my body. I watched her tease me with a long charcoal colored feather. That must have been the softness I had experienced, I thought to myself. Karl sat there, and watched her loving me, stroking himself. My mind whirled, I went numb. She continued to love me for a long time. She was the one who drove me to my release. Amazed, I was unable to take my eyes from the scene that was being played out before me. When I screamed out from the intensity of my orgasm, Karl stood, moved over to the bed and penetrated me, and she watched. I was stunned. I had no idea that all of this had happened to me only an hour earlier. As I watched Karl pump his glorious manhood into me, I smiled. He really did listen to me during all of those long, telephone conversations. That night I had explored more than I ever thought I would have. As the television screen went black, the phone rang out. I picked it up. "Hello?"

"Dana? Did you see the tape?" Karl questioned.

"Yes." I quietly answered, blushing profusely.

"You were incredible tonight Dana. May we explore again in the future?"

Again I answered with a quiet "Yes."

I could hear him smile on the other end of the telephone line. The smile was followed with a whispered, "Soon." And then a soft click. He was gone......For now.

Jennifer....... Sunday October 26, 1997